SPECIAL TEAMS:SMALL THINGS THAT MAKE A BIG DIFFERENCE
PLAY #2 HONESTY-Complete Lack of Deception
There aren’t many words that can have as much of an effect on every part of a man’s life than “honesty”.
- Honesty is what every woman wants in a man.
- Your kids will develop honesty as a lifestyle by watching you.
- What employer wouldn’t choose an honest man over a dishonest one?
- The people who work for you will go the extra mile if they know you’re honest with them.
Honesty is just everything.
Men live in a world that sends them mixed messages- be honest, but at the same time do whatever it takes to get ahead. Because men are wired to succeed, lies become a tool they use to climb the ladder. The reason is they think they’ll be at a disadvantage if they don’t.
If that weren’t enough, men have been raised to distinguish between small lies- like when you answer “no” when your wife asks if her jeans make her butt look big- and real lies. Some people even call them “beneficial lies”, lies that protect another person’s feelings.
Why don’t men tell the truth? Why is it so tough? Here a few reasons people lie:
- Fear of punishment.
- Afraid of hurting someone’s feelings.
- Fear that someone will think badly of us.
- Don’t want somebody to have more success than us.
- To protect someone or ourselves
- Don’t want to be taken advantage of.
- And the big one, we lie to ourselves because we’re afraid of facing our stuff.
The weird thing is we think there’s safety in lies, when the reality is there is safety in the truth. My friend Brad Johnson has a great quote about honesty “The ugly truth is better than a pretty lie.” That pretty much sums it up.
SCRIMMAGE
Steps to Honesty:
- Tell the complete truth
- Be honest in your negotiations
- Avoid spin
- Learn to celebrate the success of others.
- Honesty starts with telling yourself the truth
Wondering what to do if you struggle with honesty? I got a verse for you
“First, help me never to tell a lie. Second, give me neither poverty nor riches! Give me just enough to satisfy my needs.” Proverbs 30:8
HUDDLE DISCUSSION STARTER
Think about how you felt the last time you found out somebody had lied to you.
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
One question may be how do you answer when your wife asks you if her butt looks big…
Seriously…I feel hurt when someone lies to me…but I have been dishonest on so many levels for so long, I understand the motivations for it, so I feel grace for them and forgive them–I ask for forgiveness if there is anything I did to make them feel the need to protect themselves from me or my reactions that they would anticipate.
Now, I am obsessed with truth and revelation, but my desire to come clean on all my stuff will lead to deep hurt for those around me. I have been told that I would be selfish if I come clean on everything. I have been told that truth is the way to go through life…but is it to soul cleanse myself…get off the guilt?
I am being counseled by elders, counselors, and friends to tread carefully. Who has been down this road? What did you do?
This is an area that requires much wisdom. I guess one thing I’d say is to always tell the truth, especially if you’re asked a direction question. The wisdom comes in knowing when to tell the unasked for truth.
{ 1 trackback }